Selling Tip: Use Social Dynamics to Control Sales Appointments


By Frank Rumbauskas


Many areas of selling that I’ve studied and taught to others are rarely, if ever, known and used in the world of professional selling. One of those is the science of social dynamics – before I ever began learning it myself and including it in my training, I’d never before seen it used in sales.

Social dynamics is the science of using nonverbal sub-communication to influence others. What does this include? The primary elements of our nonverbal sub-communication are body language, vocal tone, inflection and volume, eye contact, movement and carriage of the body, and other subtle but important elements.

The consequences of not using proper social dynamics in your sales interactions are severe, and most of us don’t even know we’re doing anything wrong because we haven’t been taught. The situation is much like cold calling – salespeople who cold call only do so because they don’t know any alternatives. However, by not paying attention to our social dynamics, we unknowingly give our power away to prospects, let them have control of sales appointments, create an impression that we are not successful, give prospects the “gut feeling” that they should not buy from us … all unknowingly.

So, that said, what can we do to make sure we don’t short-circuit all of our efforts by using improper social dynamics? Following is a brief and very basic – but highly effective – checklist of things you need to watch out for while selling:

1. Body language. (This isn’t easy to explain without pictures so bear with me!) Be careful not to lean in to prospects when talking with them. Leaning in sub-communicates weakness and submission. Lean back when you are in front of prospects. This sub-communicates that you are the leader, are in control, and will cause prospects to be more willing to follow your lead and buy. In addition, you should never face a prospect more than they are facing you. In other words, if a prospect is not facing you straight-on while sitting or standing, you should be turned away just a degree more than the prospect is turned away from you. It is okay to face a prospect straight-on only after they have fully turned to face you directly. If you face them directly before they do so to you, you are sub-communicating neediness and submission. However, by allowing the prospect to do so first, they are automatically placed in the submissive role and will be much easier to close.

2. If you cannot hear a prospect, never lean in directly when they repeat themselves. Instead, turn sideways, so that your ear is facing the prospect, but your face is turned away. This allows you to hear the prospect better but without taking a weak stance.

3. Your voice. The single most important thing you can do to be a more effective salesperson is to have a powerful, commanding voice. Like a firm handshake, an impressive vocal presence sub-communicates power and leadership and will cause prospects to be much more willing to buy from you. Practice speaking louder in your everyday communications. You don’t want to yell or strain; instead, focus on speaking from your core, your abdomen, which will result in the commanding voice you need to have to be effective.

Imagine a general who speaks powerfully, but without yelling or straining. This is what you should strive for. I achieved this by simply talking that way all the time. An added benefit is that you will automatically become an excellent public speaker by having this talent, which you can then leverage into more sales by volunteering to speak at networking events, chamber of commerce meetings, and other “target-rich” environments. It will also be a necessary skill should you wish to go into sales training or public speaking later in your career, a choice that is available to all successful salespeople.

4. Your presence. This is closely related to body language, but has more to do with posture than with positioning yourself in front of prospects. For example, weak people are afraid of infringing on others’ personal space, so they keep a small presence. Avoid this by standing with your feet at least a foot apart, leaning back slightly, and having your shoulders back and chin up. This is a powerful stance that sub-communicates leadership and confidence. The same rules hold true while sitting – keep your feet flat on the floor (no crossed legs), with your arms spread wide rather than holding them close together. Unless you are sitting with your arms on the desk, lean back in your chair while speaking. Again, you’re demonstrating command of the situation by doing so.

What about pacing the movements of your prospect? Don’t do it. This is one of those “old, right answers” from the old school of selling that is now wrong. Most prospects can pick up on this because it’s been done to them so many times before, and, what’s worse, why would you want to pace your prospects’ mannerisms when you run the risk of reflecting their own weak body language? In addition, it shows a lack of independence, which is the biggest killer of the powerful, confident persona you want to demonstrate in appointments.

Finally, remember that this is not a competition. These suggestions are not given with the intent to rule your prospects. They simply allow you to present yourself as a powerful leader whose advice should be taken, and the end result is that prospects will feel extremely comfortable with entrusting their business to you. Follow these tips, and your close rates will suddenly explode!


More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Sales Information:

Related Articles

Top Seven Ways to Write An Order-Pulling Sales Letter
Ready to put your Web pages up? Ready to sell a lot more products and services? If you're not getting the sales, you want you may want to think "makeover." Whether you're just starting or doing a web makeover, you need to Power Write your sales letters.
UK Sales and Marketing Terminology
Terminology / AcronymsABC figures: This is the independently audited sales figure for all recognised publications in the UK. By using the ABC figure, you can quickly establish how much the advertising will cost per 1,000 readers.
Using Emotion for Persuasion
The other day, I received the last issue of a business magazine before my subscription runs out. Now, I like this magazine, but I'm swamped with reading matter so I won't renew.
YOUR Future Profits -- Protect Source With CARE
At 21 years, just out of Business College, I went into the mail-order business. Spent 4-1/2 years in this venture and learned many valuable lessons about building customer relationships.
15 Ways To Get Really Motivated
First, recognize that motivation is an inside job. The word motivate means to impel, inspire, hope, stimulate, incite, propel, spur, goad, move, induce, prompt, instigate, fire, provoke, actuate, cause, egg on, drive, excite, and to trigger.
Picture Yourself a Winner
In the work place, the amount of good things that happen to a person during the day far out number the amount of bad things that happen, so why do we spend so much time stressing over the bad things when we should be smiling about the good things.One reason being, when something bad happens, such as being berated by a customer, it shakes us up a little bit, maybe our pride has been touched up a little.
Write On The Money: The Ten Commandments (Plus Five) Of Profitable Sales Letter Writing
According to the Direct Marketing Association, in 2003 U.S.
What Successful Sellers Know - Others Dont ... The Subtle Art of Closing
Ask any salesperson, "At what point in the selling process does the 'Close' take place?" Eight out of ten will answer, "at the End". To be fair, they are not totally incorrect but they are, nevertheless, more wrong than right proving in principle and in practice, Perado's Law: Twenty percent of the sales force make eighty percent of the sales and profitability.
The "Write" Way to More Sales
The sales letter you can't put down?the advertising copy that makes you want the product?the resume that prompts you to call the job candidate this second?all these are examples of exceptional business writing. While you certainly know good writing when you see it, can you write with the same pizzazz the professionals use to hold your attention for pages on end?In today's selling arena, writing skills have taken a backseat to other seemingly more important professional development activities.
Ten Quick Etiquette Tips for Business Lunches
Knowing what to do when meeting a prospective client forlunch, or going to lunch with the boss or colleague can beconfusing at times. Here is a quick list of items toremember: 1.
Mortgage Leads, Choosing the Best Option
When it comes to buying mortgage leads, there are many good companies out there for you to research, and many avenues to travel down when considering which lead type will work best for you.While working as a loan officer, I dealt with my fair share of mortgage lead companies.
6 Steps on How to Install Confidence Into Your Clients
What methods can we use to install confidence into yourclients ?1. Give abundant value in everything you sell.
What Are Car Boot Sales?
If you live in England then you will already be familiar with car boot sales but I will still offer some valuable tips on how you can make money or find a bargain. However, if you are a resident of any other country then you are unlikely to know what car boot sales are and I hope to enlighten you as to these weekly events.
What Not To Do With Your Leads
Anyone that works in sales knows just how important it is to have lead sources to keep your pipeline filled. But it is not only how we obtain the leads that is important, it's what we do with them once we get them.
How to Eliminate Objections to Price
Have you ever stepped your way through the sales processonly to be disappointed by your prospect's objection toyour price?This situation unfolds all too regularly for many smallbusiness owners.The other day I was talking to Joan who was lamenting how she'd spent a ton of time developing a relationship with a new prospect, but in the end wasn't able to make the sale.
Aamazing Tips To Increase Your Sales
1. When you make your first sale, follow-up with the customer.
Why USPs Dont Work
The USP (Unique Selling Proposition) is based on the assumption that if you can't be better than the competition then being different will usually suffice.It is true that most businesses scrape by in the midst of mediocrity.
Talking To A Prospect As If To A Friend
While working with a new coaching client, I asked to hear her sound bite. Everyone needs a good sound bite.
How to Sell Your Products Without Competition
Selling your products at shows can be difficult when you have a lot of competition. Although some show organizers are careful to have a good mix of vendors, it's not uncommon for other shows to have 20% or more of the booths filled with vendors in the same niche - which is a buyer's market and a seller's disappointing show.
Customer Loyalty in the Technology Industry
For technology companies, service after the sale has emerged on equal footing with innovation as a competitive advantage.As technology-related products and services touch nearly every area of our lives and our businesses, technology has become integrated in how we communicate, learn, work, and entertain ourselves.