The Two-Headed Monster
By Jerry Aragnon
It was Halloween night (1995), and my wife and I took our boys, ages 10 and 12 to a Halloween party at the local elementary school, which both boys attended. This was the first time I had attended a Halloween party like this, so I didn't know what to expect.
We arrived at the school, and all of us headed for the school cafeteria, where the festivities were to take place. All along the way, I noticed dozens of kids dressed up in scary and creative costumes...lots of color everywhere! And, there would be lots of goodies for everyone later on. Our boys were dressed up as well, and they would compete for prizes at the party, too. There would be a Grand Prize awarded for the best costume at the end of the night.
When we arrived at the cafeteria, my wife and the boys headed off someplace to see friends they knew, and I found a chair at an empty table and sat alone. I noticed two boys about ten years old, who were working on their costume. They had a pair of large men's coveralls, and they were down on the floor, spreading the coveralls out. They were meticulously enlarging the pant holes and straightening out the costume. At this point, I could not imagine what they were doing.
What they were doing, was positioning the coveralls on the floor, with the pant holes just right. Then, they both stepped into the pant holes...one boy in front and the other boy behind the first boy. The boy in the back would put his arms around the waist of the boy in front. Gently and carefully, they pulled the coveralls up to cover both of them, and the coveralls were buttoned up in the front. Now, both of the boys were in a single pair of coveralls. The boy in the back, would look over the shoulder of the boy in the front! (Did you get that?)
The extra large coveralls, were big enough to house both boys, and now they were ready for the next step. I didn't know what was going on with these two kids, but I was already to laugh! On the table next to them, were two hideous looking rubber masks the boys would wear. The masks were filled with pimples, fake blood, runny-looking stuff, protruding teeth and the masks were simply GROSS! I still had no idea what the boys were supposed to be, so I asked.
"We're the Two-Headed Monster," came the reply from behind one of the masks. I should have known...I fell back in my chair with laughter again! I was coming unglued!
It was amazing to me, that these two boys came up with such a clever idea such as this. I was impressed right from the beginning with them. They were obviously going to have a little coordination with this outfit, as they were both in the same costume. I thought surely that they were going to take a spill, but they never did. They must have done some rehearsing.
After a few minutes of last minute preparation, they were off! Hup...123...hup...123 and they lumbered off across the cafeteria. I followed along, and the first thing I noticed about the boys, was the fussing and fighting they did with each other, from the beginning to the end... such as "slow down"..."you're going too fast"..."tell me when you're going to stop"..."I don't want to go here, or I don't want to go there" and so forth! It was the fussing and fighting behind those masks that made it more funny!
I stayed with them the whole night, listening to them argue with each other. The laughing got worse on my part, as I followed them down the hallways of the school, listening to them and watching their every move. It was hilarious! For more than 40 minutes, I followed these boys around the school...everywhere they went, I was not far behind. I thought for sure they would fall over...they would stray to the right...and, then stray to the left and almost go over, but somehow they stayed on their feet. They made people laugh all along the way, and everyone was enjoying them!
Finally, as the night wore on, it was time for the judging for the best costumes, in general, and then for the Grand Prize winner! There was a lot of excitement in the cafeteria! What an anxious moment, as a man, probably a school teacher, stood at the podium and called out various winners in different categories. The winners went up to the stage and claimed their prizes, etc.
As things got tense...now, it was time for the Grand Prize to be awarded! The man at the podium was handed a piece of paper with a name on it of the winner! There was silence...as he said..."The Grand Prize winner for the best costume goes to...more silence...The Two-Headed Monster! Cheers, screams, and applause rang out across the cafeteria!
And, then it happened! The two boys had not yet gotten out of the coveralls, and in their haste in winning the Grand Prize, they took a spill, as they tried to get to the podium! A couple of adults quickly helped them get out of the coveralls, as they struggled to get out! When they finally got untangled, they were giving high-fives to each other, and to kids along the way to the podium!
I was certainly pulling for them! They gave everyone at school such joy and laughter. There was screaming and shouting all over the cafeteria when they won. I will never forget this night as I had so much fun, and I will never forget the Two-Headed Monster! They got high marks for their creativity, and they entertained us all night long!