Conflicts With Your Boss Are Inevitable, But Can Be Healthy

If you are a pro-active, get-things-done type, sooner or later you will come in conflict with your boss. The same sort of assertiveness and confidence that leads you to have a mind of your own has helped him to earn his position.

Another reality is that if you do not have some periodic disagreements with your supervisors you are probably not being as assertive as you should be in moving your career ahead.

These conflicts can prove to be hazardous to the health of your career if they are not handled with common sense, says Ramon Greenwood, senior career counselor, www.CommonSenseAtWork.com>

No one enjoys conflict, especially with the boss. But when you have an honest difference of opinion, it is better to pay the price of discomfort and take the risk of some penalty than to bottle up the frustration and nagging conscience that results from not meeting what you see as your responsibilities.

Knowing you will have conflicts, you can be prepared to handle them so there are no individual losers.

TURN CONFLICTS TO ADVANTAGES

Greenwood says there are nine steps you can take to lessen the damage that can result from conflicts with your boss. In fact, you can turn these conflicts to your advantage.

1. The first step is to concisely define the issue-- preferably in writing-- so that you have a clear understanding as to what the controversy is all about. Determine how important it is to the parties involved and to the organization.

If it is not truly important beyond your personal feelings, forget it. Save your energies for another time when the stakes are significant.

2. Give full consideration to the points of view of all parties concerned, especially the boss. His responsibilities are different than yours. He may have a legitimate reason for his opinion, which you are not aware of at the moment. The conflict you see may disappear with an explanation.

3. Weigh your reasons and objectives against the good of the organization. Before you "go to the mat" on an issue, be sure you are motivated by what you believe to be the larger interest and not just your own narrowly defined agenda.

4. Ask for a face-to-face discussion with your boss if, after due consideration, you still feel the difference is worth pursuing. If the matter is not resolved with a meeting, ask permission to leave a written explanation with your boss for his further consideration.

5. Never push your boss into a corner where he has no room for compromise. Do not air the conflict with your boss in the presence of others.

6. Avoid letting the matter be positioned on a personal basis. Emotions and personalities have no place in a confrontation with the boss.

7. Be tactful. Show respect for the boss's position and responsibilities. Whatever the outcome of your differences with him, he is still your boss.

8. Keep the matter in perspective. It is good to remember that win, lose or draw, it is a rare situation when the resolution of an issue results in a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow or the world coming to an end.

9. Don't pin a medal on your chest if you prevail or wear the black of mourning if the decision goes the other way. Get on with the job. If you have been heard and the boss still doesn't agree, be a good trooper, support his decision, openly and aggressively. If the outlook is contrary to your basic values look for another job.

If you can't discuss the inevitable conflicts with your boss in a free and open manner so as to arrive at acceptable resolutions, or if such disagreements are so frequent and painful that your life and career are being disrupted, recognize you have a problem larger than any single issue. It may be that you are at odds with the standards and objectives of the boss or the organization. Or the personal chemistry between you and your boss may be out of balance.

If you can't resolve the conflicts or live with them, locate another opportunity. Life is too short to exist in a world of turmoil and confrontations, in the opinion of Greenwood.

Senior career counselor for http://www.CommonSenseAtWork.com,Ramon Greenwood is a former senior vice president of American Express; a professional director for various businesses; a consultant; a published author of career related books and a syndicated column


More Resources

Get Beyond Your Tasks
Ever hear the story of the two masons working side by side at a building site? They're doing the same work under pretty much the same conditions. Then, one day a stranger comes along, approaches one of the men and asks him, "What are you doing?" "I don't know and I don't care," replies the man, his voice brimming with irritation.
References: Choose Wisely
Sophisticated job seekers know and understand that sometime during the interview and hiring process you will be asked to supply references. With this in mind, here are five concepts to focus on in developing your reference list.
Job Tips For The Frustrated Job Seeker
There is nothing more frustrating and depressing when you are out of work and trying to find a job and your job search is going no where. Don't feel bad, you are not alone and there is a good reason why searching for a new job can be so difficult.
From The WorkWise Collection: Ten Ways to Win the Job Search Mind Game
Are you one of the thousands of job seekers who question their sanity, marketability, and capacity to make smart decisions-just because you've lost your job? Are you wondering how to overcome these psychological challenges, rebuild your self-confidence, increase your marketability, and regain your sense of sanity?In today's competitive job market you need more than a killer résumé and great interviewing skills to survive. Twenty-first-century job seekers must be able to deal with ambiguity, maintain a winner's mindset, demonstrate customer focus, and have a blow-your-socks-off résumé and excellent interviewing skills.
Get Off Your Butt and Out of the Rut
It's amazing to see so many people who are prepared to sacrifice their lives for the sake of their careers.I'm sure you know of someone like that.
Is A Career a Calling or Choice?
How much of our career path is destiny and how much is free will? In my opinion, it is 50/50. We are given a life map at the beginning of our lives, and there are things we are meant to learn, people we are meant to meet, work we are meant to perform.
3 Creative Job Search Tactics
It's a fact: the best jobs attract loads of competition. So it pays to do whatever you can to stand out as a persistent, creative candidate, one that any sane employer would love to hire.
21st Century Career Success
When it comes to modern career development, one thing we can all count on is change. With the advent of technology, telecommuting, and E-commerce, how work is performed is in a state of reinvention.
Corporate World: Jungle Or Paradise?
The road to the top is not easy, it is bumpy and dirty. Along the way, we meet interesting creatures.
Drive Your Career Change - A Direct Approach
If your career has gone off the road, take control and drive back to job satisfaction with a direct approach.When you're looking for that new job or a career move it's easy to think that 'they' hold all the cards.
Resumes and First impressions
Hunting for a position in a new career field? Trying to take your new education or skills and transform them into a job with a future?I've spent the last few weeks working in a placement service trying to help people find that first "career" job; trying to help them make the transition from student to employee. I see the same mistakes over and over again.
Hello Work World, Im Un-Retiring
For many years, you looked forward to that day when you would bid the world of work a fond farewell and ride off into the sunset of your golden years.Initially, it felt wonderful not to have to go somewhere each morning.
Seven Tips to a Job-Winning Interview
These days, interviews don't come easily. When you get The Call, make the most of your time -- and go for it!1.
Back to School for a Career Change
Q. I hate my job as a computer consultant.
Why Employers Want an Employee with a Degree
You wake up in the morning, head to work, and find out your company is downsizing and you are being laid off. No big deal you think, you have experience, you've worked at the same company for years.
How to Reach Your Next Job Faster with Fewer Potholes, Roadblocks
Complacency damages your career more than lack of qualifications. The most obvious roadblock you'll encounter on the race to find your next job is usually regrets about skills, education, and professional knowledge.
How To Receive Payment as a Freelance Translator?
A problem most freelance translators are facing with is how to receive payment. In particular: How to receive payment for small jobs.
Ten Things About Your Career Development
There are some tactics you can action whatever you wish for from your career. Whatever you might think right now, you have all the tools you need for a career which give you joy and fulfilment.
Make Your Resume Keyword Rich and Scanner Friendly
If you haven't looked for a job recently, there are new tactics that hiring professionals are using that you should be aware of before updating your resume.Employers and recruiters increasingly rely on electronic resumes, resume posting boards and job banks to find job candidates.
Unemployment Survival: Creating a Sense of Security
In a time of economic downturn, international turmoil, company restructuring and corporate mergers run amok, thousands of people are either out of work or fearful of losing their jobs.Is there, then, such a thing as job security?No job, in itself, is totally secure.

More Careers & Employment Information:

Related Articles

Stepping Stone Jobs
What we name something matters.It sets a tone that alters our attitude.
Job Hunting Tips: Accepting Judgment
Applying for work is stressful, no matter the circumstances. Even if you are already working, and merely looking to see what else is out there, you still want to be offered the position.
Using Journal to Support Your Job Search
Are you searching for a job? Here are some tips on how youcan use journaling in that pursuit.It is important to know what we are looking for in aposition and company.
Successful Job Interview Tips
Congratulations! You've finally landed that job interview you've been waiting for. Now the real work begins! Remember, resumes don't get jobs; they merely get you in the door.
Wake Up and Learn Something New
The US Government has just released last month's job creation figures. It was the lowest number in two years.
Career Education Options For Working Adults
Ask yourself this question: "Do I like what I do for a living?" If you answered "no", what are you doing about it? Maybe you have a "good" job, but it's not very rewarding to you personally. Maybe you have job with good pay, but bad hours or worse - a job with good hours, but bad pay.
One Step at a Time in the Job Search
What is the first step to take in a job search?Let's start with "Who Am I?" If the job seeker can answer that question easily, then the rest of what to do, comes easily.It is often the hardest thing to do in a job quest, or anything else in life.
Are Your References Ready?
One of the most common forms of background check performed by companies hiring new employees is the reference check. They typically request that candidates provide them with three names of previous bosses.
Closing the Gap on Your Career Goals
If you still picture a steady progression up the ladder when you think of your career goals, it is time to shift your thinking. For most people, climbing the career ladder is no longer an option.
Blogging for Candidates 101: Nuts and Bolts
A "blog" is simply an internet (web) log. Blogs are created for personal or professional use.
When the Teacher Becomes the Student
A relationship expert once said that during an argument, there's usually three sides to every story: his side, her side, and of course, the truth.This is something we must definitely keep in mind as teachers.
Unemployment Survival: Creating a Sense of Security
In a time of economic downturn, international turmoil, company restructuring and corporate mergers run amok, thousands of people are either out of work or fearful of losing their jobs.Is there, then, such a thing as job security?No job, in itself, is totally secure.
Thank-You Notes: An Integral Part of Your Career Design
There is one little practice that is vital to generating the interest of potential employers. It is critical, but very few job seekers actually do it.
Discontentment in the Workplace
While more people are finding employment, more employed workers are discontent and experiencing frustration. In most cases it can be boiled down to four factors: feeling undervalued, unappreciated and powerless, and world events.
Electronic Resume Writing Tips That Boost Your Interview Appointment Success
Electronic Resume Writing Tips That Boost Your Interview Appointment SuccessBefore you write your resume in a word processor, print it, and hand out copies to prospective employers, you should consider formatting it for easy scanning and retrieval from a computer database.As you can imagine, dozens, maybe hundreds of resumes bombard employers for a position they would like filled.
How To Write A Job Winning Resume That Puts Yours On Top
Many people would love to get a better job. And most of these same people have the proper training and skills to achieve this goal.
How to Conquer Job Hunting Apathy
Jack, downsized from his last job, was frozen in a place called Apathy. Had been for months now.
Write Resume Keywords That Gets Your Application Read
As children we often used to read stories where magical words can open caves filled with treasures or magicians using words like abracadabra..
The Best Business And Economy Solutions
In todays Business and economy, starting any business service requires a good business plan. A little money wouldn't hurt either.
Students Discover Your Niche By Using Career Assessment
In our ever changing world where job competition is rampant it can be difficult to understand one's strengths and what one wants to do in life.If you feel uncertain about your career path you're not alone.