Caring for Aging Relatives

It happens somewhat slowly in the beginning, maybe with a small cough that gets worse as time goes on. It might simply begin with absent mindedness which is totally out of character, followed by total memory lapses. What do we do when our parents eventually need taking care of after they have spent so much of their adult lives taking care of us? What precisely is a child's responsibility to them? Is it self-centered to relocate them into an assisted home? And which siblings should shoulder the responsibility? These are questions which plague families whenever a parent happens to become sick.

It is certainly very normal for feelings of guilt and even occasionally depression to happen to you because of a deteriorating parent. But happily there are some good associations that do offer expert advice on coping with these problems. And there are specialists in this arena who can work with you to help you through the hard times.

Local hospitals, hospices and nursing homes usually have such names and numbers to assist you in this regard. If your dad feels certain that someone has broken into the house just to steal his chocolate when he has in fact eaten it himself, do not argue with him or say that his theories are irrational. Just calmly acknowledge how he feels and make him feel safe and loved. Do small things to alleviate his fears like simply letting him see you lock the doors or secure the windows at night before going to bed. If you get an unsatisfactory attitude from his physician, take him to a geriatric psychiatrist for further examination.

Erratic behavior is one of the earlies warning signals of dementia. If your mom starts cussing at the dinner table in front of the kids just because her steak is a bit undercooked, correct her calmly by teaching her the appropriate behavior: "Excuse me, my steak is a little undercooked, can you put it back on the grill for me please?"

Never resort to bad language yourself, as this will just perpetuate the unwanted behavior. If you feel yourself losing your own temper, take a few deep breaths until you are able to control your emotions. If you are being verbally assualted then it may be best to detach from being called offensive names. Give 3 warnings, use the silent treatment and then just walk away if the behavior goes on.

This can be one of the touphest problems to cope with, particularly for a very stubborn parent. Driving is so commonly related to having freedom and yet if you get reports that your dad is passing stop signs or driving on the wrong side of the street you have to deal with it. If you take his keys away from him, he may resent you, so it may be best to take a more indirect approach.

Take him or her for a "normal" checkup to check his vision, then ask the physician for a note expressing that the patient should not be driving anymore. Send the letter to the DMV requesting that his license be taken away. This may take a few weeks, but when the DMV takes away his license, be sympathetic and do research on transportation for seniors in the area, which is usually inexpensive and efficient.

For further information go to Fish Oil News and find out some additional facts about aging and the possible effect of fish oil on Alzheimers.

Ryan Joseph is a writer/researcher. For more info. visit http://www.omega3fishoil.org/

More Resources


Stairlifts - Take the Struggle Out of Climbing the Stairs
Buying a stairlift can have huge benefits for your quality of life, giving you back some freedom and independence. Stairlifts can be adapted to your individual needs, so no matter what your requirements are, there'll be one to suit you.
Strategies on Paying for Nursing Home Care and Medicaid
The decision to place your loved one into a nursing home is anextremely difficult decision, often causing much guilt for thecaregiver. It is a very emotional decision for most clients we see andmost are under a certain amount of stress, often great, when facing whatthey consider to be a drastic course of action.
Ask Rusty - Maximizing Widow's Benefits
Dear Rusty: I am 64 years old, born in October of 1952, and in rapidly declining health. I took my Social Security early, as soon as I was 62, and now get $1838 per month in Social Security benefits (before Medicare premiums are taken out).
Stair Lift Buying Guide
There is no doubt that having a stair lift in your home can dramatically improve your quality of life. If you are starting to find that climbing the stairs is becoming a hazardous experience, or just hard work, then a stair lift could be the answer.
Alzheimers Care Giving While Maintaining Your Own Health
Just for a moment I want you to imagine that you are coming out of a very deep sleep. If you have ever had surgery try to remember the way you felt as you were trying to make sense of things as you awoke.
A Silly Story: The Benefits of Childis Antics for Seniors
Want to remain young at heart as you get on in years? According to the experts, there's a "silly" way that could help you grow old gracefully, with a smile on your face.
Short Trips Can Stimulate Alzheimers Patients
Severe degradation of short-term memory means that my father, an Alzheimer's elder, is seldom interested in movies or books. And, although music used to be a source of enjoyment, he no longer listens with pleasure.
Skilled Nursing Homes - What Are They?
A skilled nursing home is a medical facility providing services similar to a hospital. The homes are staffed with licensed nurses, shared rooms, hospital beds, regular scheduled doctor rounds, meals and housekeeping.
The Best Investment You Can Make Right Now: Long Term Care Insurance
Don't think you need it? Consider this: a full 50% of Americans over the age of 50 will need long term care at some point in their lives. The average cost of nursing facility care (or home health care assistance) is $61,000 per year, and the average stay in a long term care facility is 2½ years.
Nursing Home Staffing Levels: How Much Is Enough?
During the week of February 17, 2002, headlines screamed the news - more than 92% of US nursing homes fail to have an adequate number of staff to provide quality care for elderly residents. Newspapers and radio programs based their stories on the new study the Health Care Financing Administration (HCFA) recently provided to the Senate's Special Committee on Aging.
Respiratory Help Is Available For Seniors With COPD
As HMOs Continue to Drop Coverage for Seniors - Now Over 500,000 Victims - Those Needing Expensive Respiratory Medication, Support and Homecare Services are the Hardest HitOne Patient Advocate, Geriatric Services of America, is Providing Relief to Victimized Patients Through a Unique, Often No-Cost ProgramMore than 536,000 US senior citizens are scrambling to find new doctors or new coverage because their health plans terminated their Medicare managed-care services, according to a Nonrenewal Report issued by the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services for the year 2002. Among the hardest hit are seniors in California (84,000), Florida (59,000), Pennsylvania (55,000), New Jersey (53,000), Texas (46,000), and Michigan (31,000), who will be losing coverage in the coming year.
Paying For Elder Care Just Got Easier
It's not a surprise that thousands of families across the nation are facing the challlenges of an aging population. The "sandwich" generation, those who are caring for their children as well as their parents, have been feeling the financial pinch of caring for loved ones.
Scaling Down (Almost) Painlessly
Moving to a smaller house or apartment in a retirement community almost always involves a certain degree of trauma, both for the elder who's moving and for family members. However, by planning ahead you can reduce the discomfort involved and turn what might well become a nightmare into a pleasant event.
Arizona Senior Housing: Care Options for Seniors Who Can No Longer Live Alone
The following are a few of the care options available for seniors who can no longer live on their own and require assistance with their Activities of Daily Living (ADL), or require skilled nursing care. Every state is a little different in terms of availability and cost, state regulations, and the specific names used for each care option:Assisted Living Home- A facility consisting of 10 or fewer residents in a private home setting located in residential neighborhoods.
The Golden Years
1) What does Adrian Mitchell say we do to people when their working lives are over?Adrian says that "when a man's too ill to work we punish him", rob him of half his income or replace it with "pocket money" and or place him in a retirement home to sit out the remainder of his live in isolation.2) What does he think about this?Adrian thinks that "the old people are being robbed" and says "to hell with retiring" he believes that the way that deal with old people (to have your ability to sport yourself removed and then being given "pocket money").
Caregiving Across The Miles-Tips for Successful Long Distance Caregiving
Caring for a parent or a loved one is a difficult job. Your duties as a caregiver become increasingly difficult as the miles increase between you and your loved one.
Long Term In-home Care Options
Are you worried that you may lose all your life's earnings and nest egg due to the rising costs of in-home long term care? As you get older do you have the necessary finances to protect yourself from going broke while slightly incapacitated? Many seniors are worried about are worried about the costs of long-term health care.Are you worried that if something happens to you, that you may run out of money and burn thru their reserves and all your nest egg.
Just Give Them a Lot of Love and You'll be Fine
It was right about this time, 19 years ago. My wife and I were sitting in the very last Lamaze birthing class, soon to be brand new parents.
What Most Long Term Care Professionals Don't Know
Medicare recognizes this need and, therefore reimburses your residents to receive advanced behavioral health services? making them free to your facility!Psychologists provide a wide variety of valuable and testedclinical services that can provide a big shot in the arm to yournursing home care. For example:1.
Ask Rusty - Can I Re-marry, or not?
Dear Rusty: After a pretty difficult 32 years of marriage and ugly divorce a few years ago, I finally found the man of my dreams.
>

More Elder Care Information:

Related Articles


Introducing the Best Available Long Term Care Policy Guarantee
If you're 60 to 70 years old ..
Advocate For Senior Citizens - Protecting Against Abuse and Fraud
Ruth is 87 years old this year and has been living alone since 1997. She is in good health, however the daily chores around the home became increasingly difficult.
Board and Care Homes - What Are They?
Board and Care homes (also known as RCFE's - Residential Care Facilities for the Elderly) are residential private homes that have been licensed by the Department of Social Services to provide services to seniors. Most accept no more than six residents, but offer a cozy, home-like setting for frail seniors.
The Right Wheelchair Accessories Will Ease Your Life and Your Journeys on Wheels
Wheelchairs come in every shape and size with sufficient options that you can find the wheels you like to take you where you want to go with the assistance you need. To enhance the comfort and convenience of your journey, choose accessories tailored to provide the best support for your activities and your health concerns.
New Hope for Alzheimers Treatment
There is now widespread agreement among research scientists and medical professionals that Alzheimer's Disease (AD) is a problem quickly growing to vast proportions. As the life expectancy of Americans continues to rise, increasing the percentage of the population over 65 years of age, so does the number of Alzheimer's cases.
Ask Rusty - Child Benefits Stopped at 18
Dear Rusty: I received my Social Security payment for February but not for the month of March.
Compare Nursing Homes
Finding the best nursing home is easier than you might think. That is assuming there is more than one nursing home in your area so that you have something to compare.
Good news: A 2018 increase for Social Security beneficiaries
The good news is that Social Security beneficiaries will get a 2% boost in their checks in 2018 compared to the stingy three-tenths-of one-percent increase awarded in 2017, according to Dan Weber, president of the Association of Mature American Citizens [AMAC].
Solitary Confinement -- for Life
Sixty-five year old Arthur Jones served a self-imposed life sentence - in his own home.Arthur lived in a high crime neighborhood, so he built iron cages around his outside doors and installed bars on all the windows.
Could You Be Missing Out On Senior Discounts? Here Are A Few Things To Know
People who reach or near their retirement years often need to watch every penny.
Short Trips Can Stimulate Alzheimers Patients
Severe degradation of short-term memory means that my father, an Alzheimer's elder, is seldom interested in movies or books. And, although music used to be a source of enjoyment, he no longer listens with pleasure.
Assisted Living Facilities - What Are They?
Assisted Living facilities are generally for person's 60 years of age and older. Typical candidates need assistance with "Activities of Daily Living" (ADLs), but wish to live as independently as possible.
Mom Wont Participate!
Q: Six months ago we placed my mother in an assisted living facility. She gets along fairly well, but we thought she would get involved with all of the activities.
Hinged Rail Stair Lifts
If a door at the top or the bottom of the stairs may be blocked by the rail of the stairlift, there are a number of models designed to overcome this problem. Some manufacturers are able to produce a rail with reduced overhang upstairs, so the lift will not protrude as far into the hallway.
Scaling Down (almost) Painlessly
Moving to a smaller house or apartment in a retirement community almost always involves a certain degree of trauma, both for the elder who's moving and for family members. However, by planning ahead you can reduce the discomfort involved and turn what might well become a nightmare into a pleasant event.
What About Tennesse Dept. of Human Services Abuse of the Elderly and Their Families?
PART I: Physical Abuse of the Elderly vs. Tennessee DHS Abuse of FamiliesDuring the week of October 26, 2003, newspapers across the state of Tennessee published an Associated Press story that featured the glaring news headline, "Reports of neglect and abuse of senior citizens up 40% in six years.
The Best Investment You Can Make Right Now: Long Term Care Insurance
Don't think you need it? Consider this: a full 50% of Americans over the age of 50 will need long term care at some point in their lives. The average cost of nursing facility care (or home health care assistance) is $61,000 per year, and the average stay in a long term care facility is 2½ years.
Stair Lifts - Straight and Curved Rails
There are two types of stairlift. Straight and curved.
Long Term-Care; 70 Million Americans Will Be Over 65 by 2003
We will all grow old; this is a given. We will all have health issues as we grow older, this also is a given.
Long Term In-home Care Options
Are you worried that you may lose all your life's earnings and nest egg due to the rising costs of in-home long term care? As you get older do you have the necessary finances to protect yourself from going broke while slightly incapacitated? Many seniors are worried about are worried about the costs of long-term health care.Are you worried that if something happens to you, that you may run out of money and burn thru their reserves and all your nest egg.
>