He's So Not Into You
These are words women don't want to hear when they're in a relationship. Unfortunately these words are fact more than fiction. Of course we don't want to believe that the man we've spent a year or more with just doesn't give a damn about us. It's a hard pill to swallow.
Are there signs to know and catch? Maybe and maybe not, but we as women fail to listen and hear the warning signs that are trying to beat our brains into action. We want to continue with the man because we believe he's going to change and treat us like the queens we should be treasured for.
Here are some of the warning signs in a relationship that just doesn't work:
1. He doesn't call you often.
2. He doesn't take you anywhere anymore.
3. He never has any money.
4. He's never at home when you call.
5. His cell phone is off.
6. His demeanor is different.
7. He never invites you over to his house.
8. He doesn't even ask to come over to your house.
9. You only have his cell phone number.
10. He only calls, but talks for only five minutes.
11. He goes out of town a lot.
12. You can't drop over to his house without calling.
13. You can't depend on him for anything.
14. When you need him he's never available.
15. You never hear the three loving words, 'I love you'.
16. He's just not that affectionate.
17. You rarely have sex.
18. He has a female friend.
19. When you get in a bind or a sticky situation he's never around to bail you out.
20. He treats you like dirt.
21. He doesn't communicate.
22. Marriage isn't in his vocabulary.
23. He's cold and nonchalant.
24. You go weeks without seeing or talking to him.
25. He abuses you verbally.
26. He abuses you physically.
27. He doesn't like your children.
28. He's seeing other women.
29. He's probably married or attached.
30. He's just into you for a booty call.
31. He isn't romantic enough.
I could go on and on, but most of these are the red light of a bad relationship gone into madness. Your man just isn't into you. These are the facts, and the warning signs that this relationship just wasn't working for me, and it most certainly wasn't working for him, so we both need to shift on.
It's very difficult in a relationship when you're giving ninety-five percent and he's only giving five percent. Women are more emotional than men, and they wear their feelings on their sleeves. They tend to fall so hopelessly in love with a man; it's difficult to heed any warning signs. Of course the signs are staring you in the face constantly, but love is blind in most cases. Women tend to stay with men for various reasons when they know the relationship is doomed from the start. Women believe that they can change a man, or he'd love them so much he'd change for them. This is the main mistake women make in relationships, and it's the downfall. A man will never change his strips especially when he's much older and still destined for the old-school syndrome.
I know a woman who married a man because he said that he'd stop smoking if she married him. They got married, and the spouse is still smoking. She's very miserable and about to end her relationship because she actually thought he was so in love with her that he was going to give up the one thing he craved when he met her. This woman was demented in the brain for deluding herself into thinking her man was going to make this change for her. Men can't change, they won't change, and they will never change for anyone, especially a woman. Please!
Love and marriage doesn't come with guarantees. You love this person, and you want to spend the duration of your life with them, faults and all. We're only humans, and two personalities trying to come together in this tarnished world is very difficult to comprehend. We believe that our love will be the contributing factor to happily ever after.
I've been in relationships and they were all very disappointing to me. I had one that almost rated a happily ever after, but my insecurities ruined that relationship and eventually the man moved on. I think everyone of us has a great love in our lives, and we're blessed to still be with him, or we're mourning the breakup. It's like a death when you give your all into a relationship and it ends, or divorce is on the horizon. It can be the most devastating experience of your life.
We also have to remember that we're going to play with a lot of losers until that winner is right around the corner. Relationships are hard, difficult, exhausting, emotional, time-consuming, painful, and stressful, but all women want to be in love and loved because it's better than being alone.
This is why we know our man is so not into us, but we don't care because we'll take him for as long as we can have him. I thought about this scenario, but when you get into your sensible mode, what do you really have? If you're into a relationship that meets all thirty-one of these negative traits described above, then open your eyes, and see the forest for the trees.
Women, you truly have a dog for a man, and no confidence or self-esteem for yourself. If you're spending most of your time alone, then what is wrong with this picture? Your man is so not into you and those are the facts. Women wake up and smell the coffee or the detergent. You're alone anyway because your man is so not into you. I bet you he's too busy playing games with the ten million other women that are available. It's okay because my man is so not into me, and I'm so not into him either. I just love myself to much, and when you come right down to the needy facts, I'm truly so into me because I'm worth a bag of chips and then some.
My name is Carol Ann Culbert Johnson. Please visit my website at: http://www.freewebs.com/jcarolann Sign the guest book and explore the site. Also purchase my debut book of confession, romantic short stories, I CONFESS at http://www.publishamerica.com