Loving Every Phenomenal Part of You

Have you ever wished yourself away? I am not referring to leaving your precious life on this Earth; but rather, just wished you weren't a certain way or did not have some particular qualities and mannerisms that were so apparent to you. I know I have.

In the past, I've had a very difficult time when others would point out my weaknesses to me, either constructively or not-so tactfully. I would think, " Wow, not only do I think these are big problems I have, but now everyone else sees them as well." I would hope and pray that these parts of my personality would disappear into the deep character trait abyss. I would pretend to myself they weren't present or I would try my hardest to cover them up. I spent a lot of time and energy on hiding these areas that I wanted so desperately to vanish.

A big first step in learning to love oneself and in self-forgiveness is accepting every part of you as the unique person that you are. All of your so-labeled liabilities can be tweaked into assets, but they must first be accepted. Otherwise, you are pushing against the grain and not being authentic to your true self.

Let me give you an example of what I am talking about. In all of my past serious relationships, I have loved very passionately- so much so, that I've depended on the other person in the relationship for my happiness (what is commonly referred to as co-dependence). My moods depended on their moods, their well-being, or were correlated to the way they were treating me at the time. One can argue that this is not really love. I feel it was love, but with a very important component missing-that passionate love for myself? With it, the "dysfunctional" one-sided relationships may have flourished or an even more likely scenario~ I would have probably not attracted them in the first place (but that's a topic for another day). Once I accepted this as a part of my unique persona I was able to direct it in a more healthy manner-passionate love for my child, my work, my family, my faith, and most importantly, myself.

You may find your dark sides in anger, co-dependence, low self-esteem or a combination of these or other perhaps not so desirable traits. We are missing a part of us by wishing these traits weren't ours and not owning up to every inch of them. If we are only loving a part of ourselves or of others, we are not fully engaged in the experience of love. You know that feeling of being in a relationship where the other person may "kind of like you" or you "kind of like them". It doesn't flourish, and neither party is truly happy. It has been said by finding an area in which you have found the most struggles, therein lies your true purpose. These are gifts for us to embrace; lessons are presented for us to learn. Think of one of your greatest challenges-has that not shaped who you are today? When you are in the midst of it, it can be difficult; but when you step back, you see the beauty of it all.

Accept your yin and your yang. Accept your dark and your light. Accept your failures and your successes. I am not suggesting that we use this as an excuse to not participate in personal development or self-care, or to neglect to learn those lessons that are often presented to us throughout our lives. Instead I am suggesting that we embrace our unique selves and know that we are not on this Earth to take up space but rather to fulfill a beautiful life of our dreams in our own special way~ every valuable bit of us.

"If you can't accept yourself, then certainly no one else will."~Author Unknown

Copyright 2005~Deborah Shipley is a registered yoga teacher, publisher of a free monthly e-zine on self-esteem, and an e-book author. This article may be distributed provided the author's information is included in its entirety.http://www.tipsforinterpersonalskills.com

More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Coaching Information:

Related Articles

Why Daily Planning is So Important for Adults with ADD
For adults with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), details are a drag. We tend to see the big picture and want to jump straight to the finish line, wishing we could skip all the steps in between.
How to Get More Business Without Even Trying
Why are you in business? Hopefully you enjoy what you do, however is it because you want to make money so that you can have, be and do more in your life?Who pays you? Your clients do and never forget that. Unfortunately many people do.
Avoid the Tendency to Underestimate Your Greatness
As a whole I think there is a sad tendency in most of us to underestimate just how powerful we are. Just how much greatness lies inside each and every one of us - just waiting to get out.
Being an Emotional Victim
None of us like to think of ourselves as victims. The term "victim" brings to mind a pathetic image of a person who is powerless.
Do you know WHAT MAKES ME MAD?? It makes me SO MAD I just want to...
Sound familiar? If you want to manage anger, the only way of doing so is to listen to your self-talk. This doesn't mean listening to yourself talk.
Seeing Your Energy At Work
Our bodies are made of pure energy. With Quantum physicswe learn that the cells of our body are made of molecules, which are made of atoms, which are made of sub-atomic particles.
The Power of Visualization
Professional athletes and other highly successful people use the power of visualization technique on a regular basis. Why? Results of a 20-year study of the effects of visualization on results revealed an amazing discovery.
How to Make $100,000 Dollars as a Personal Trainer - Part B for Business!
My name is Greg Ryan. For the last twenty years I have counseled thousands of personal trainers, fitness directors and gym owners on how be successful in the health and fitness industry.
The Power of a Scope
We all know the power of a scope if you need to focus in on a target and hit it. We all need to develop and truly understand the power of the human mind's scope.
Executive Coaching and the American President
Perhaps no one better than a former U.S.
Recreating Yourself
So it's time for a change. You've taken that hard look in the mirror and you've decided that who you are is not who you want to be.
Developing Will Power and Self Discipline
Most people admire and respect strong individuals, who have won great success by manifesting will power and self discipline. They admire people, who with sheer will power, self discipline and ambition, have improved their life, learned new skills, overcame difficulties and hardships, reduced their weight, rose high in their chosen field or advanced on the spiritual path.
Coaching Skills Does Matter At Chick-fil-A
In this discussion, we talk about Coaching Skills with Phil Orazi, Dean of Chick-fil-A University and Scott Mayson, Business Consultant with Chick-fil-A in Atlanta, Georgia.Q - What is the role of an Operator at Chick-fil-A, and what are some of the challenges that an Operator faces?Phil - Operators are selected and are independent contractors for Chick-fil-A.
Is Your Life In Motion?
Ever since the Internet bubble and the 9/11 terrorist attacks, I've seen many people; including friends and family lose their jobs and/or personal fortunes overnight. The struggling economy has been merciless on the job market.
Skills for Change
The name of the game is CHANGE -- that's true at work, and it's also true in life. In both situations there are FOUR skills you can trust:1.
Q-Tip It!
Back in the 1920's when Polish-American entrepreneur Leo Gerstenzang invented cotton swabs as a safer way to clean his baby's ears, he called his product "Q-Tip." Actually, his first name-choice was "Baby Gay" - but that didn't sell, so the by-now familiar name emerged.
Nourishing Your Network
It takes less effort to keep an existing customer than to gain a new customer.This is Business 101.
Do You Really Need A Home Business Mentor?
Having a mentor can mean the difference between success and failure if you want to have a successful Internet home business.Many of you have dreamed of owning your own Internet business, and have probably been involved in countless opportunities, and succeeded at none.
The Pitfalls of Procrastination
We all put off making decisions and taking action sometimes (yes, me too). It's okay to do that occasionally but if you are a regular pontificator then it will constantly cause you pain, even if you aren't aware of it.
How to Hire a Coach
Improve Your Life! How to Hire A Coach.A reader writes, "I do not know how or where to contact a coach here.