Mandu


I think the worst of it is over. I hate to say it but the, er, uh, personnel at catattorney.com were amazing. With everything that happened, I don't think a few house monitor ankle bracelets are unreasonable. Find out tomorrow.

Okay here's what happened, but you're not going to believe it. The cats snuck into the baseball All Star activities and game. .. as a player! There was one cat in each leg and sleeve and Bigby provided the head and body. Their story was that they were from Uruguay because nobody knows what someone from Uruguay looks or sounds like. Hell, you have to look it up just to know how to spell it. Also, they don't speak English which is just like 75% of Major League. I told them I thought they might have said they were from Katmandu but they said they didn't want to attract attention. They couldn't, however, resist picking Mandu Peeplesuk for their name.

Now here is the unbelievable part. Supposedly Mandu was quite popular with the other players. The cats loved sneaking up behind other players and smashing a paper plate full of whipped cream in their faces. As a matter of fact, Mandu could often be seen smashing whipped cream pie into his own face. Mandu was actually in 2nd place in the home run derby until they had to withdraw due to what the press called a slight groin pull, but was actually a hairball. Things began to unravel though as players began to complain about strange clumps on the warning track, claw marks on their bats and a terrible smell in any pair of shoes left in a locker. And the stadium kitchen reported large amounts of food missing. Anyways, at some point during the game the only person in Uruguay with a TV called in and said Mandu was a phony as his whiskers were way too short for him to be from Uruguay. The cats got wind of this and were long gone by the time the FBI showed up and might have gotten away entirely had not the FBI been able to follow a trail of empty sardine cans stretching hundreds of miles.

I have to say the crew at catattorney.com was great. They beat almost every charge, including that crap about not having expressed written consent from Major League Baseball blah blah blah. So I guess everything turned out okay, but there was one rap they couldn't beat. The damn cats tested positive for steroids!

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