Marriage & Wedding Information |
Help Your Marriage Survive The Rough Spots
Every marriage has its ups and downs, its rough periods. Even in the best of circumstances, there are going to be difficult times. People change. Circumstances change. Emotions change. Over time, the natural ebb and flow of everyday life places incredible pressure on a relationship. Almost unnoticed at first, you begin to think thoughts that had once been unthinkable. "I love him, but I'm not in love with him. Not anymore." "I'm not attracted to her, not like I was in the beginning." "Maybe if we separated for awhile ..." The skies can darken in a hurry. But if you survive these darkest of times, you may find you emerge with a stronger, more trusting relationship than you ever imagined possible. Here are a few tips that might help you toward that goal ... == Have a clear understanding of your expectations. Couples rarely take the time to discuss how the little things will work. What does romance mean to each of you? How will the finances be handled? How will your children be raised? What role will religion play in your relationship? What makes you feel loved? What hurts you? How will arguments be resolved? How will decisions be made? What do you need from your spouse, what does your spouse need from you? == Don't fight unfairly. There will always be disagreements. Deal with the matter at hand. Don't drudge up all your hurts and disappointments from the past. Those are different matters, to be handled separately, at a different time. Keep focused on the issue under discussion and avoid muddying the waters with generalized personal attacks ("You're always nagging." "You never do anything unless I tell you to do it first.") == Face the issues that are facing you. Hiding from reality never leads to a happy ending. If you're experiencing financial problems, admit it, get it out in the open. == Be honest with yourself. Take a step back and give yourself a good long look in the mirror. If your behavior is undermining your relationship (whether it's the way you communicate, or how you treat your spouse, or your personal destructive behavior) own up to it. == Take the initiative. Understand that waiting for your spouse to change first will likely result in no change at all. Actions come first. Thoughts and feelings follow. Change your behaviors and watch your spouse's behaviors change in response. == Rebuild compatibility. Time has a way of unveiling the differences between couples, especially when your marriage is in trouble. Seek out those interests you have in common with your spouse. Look for opportunities to share activities together. Perhaps it's ballroom dancing, or photography, or camping, or trips to the beach. == Remember what it was like when you were dating. What was it that first attracted you to your spouse? What made you first fall in love? How can those feelings be rekindled? == Keep your sense of humor. Life is challenging enough without having to live with a brooding, angry spouse. Laugh out loud the way you did when you were a kid. Happiness is a choice. Exercise it. Marriage is a sacred vow to love your partner for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till ... well you know the rest. Unfortunately, for many people, the pressures, challenges, and monotony of married life have doused its wonderful positive aspects. Maybe it's time to rekindle the magic. David B. Silva
MORE RESOURCES:
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Wedding Speeches Made Easy: Wedding Speech or Best Mans Speech Tips Have you ever had to give a wedding speech? As the groom or best man?Do you remember that feeling? A knot in the stomach, sweaty palmsand a panic attack!Not a very pleasant experience. And yet, I'm sure your wedding speech has the potential to be a great success because 90 % of a typical audience want the speaker to succeed. Man Made Diamonds, The Affordable Alternative Diamonds may be a woman's best friend, but modern man made diamonds are so good as to be indistinguishable from real diamonds. And when you look at the huge savings on price, man made diamonds may be a woman's best decision. Wedding Bouquets for Life One of the most beautiful of the bride's adornments at a wedding is the bouquet. Normally constructed of fresh flowers, the wedding bouquet would last for a week or two, and then have to be dried or tossed. Mens Moissanite Wedding Rings, or Is Moissanite a Mans Best Friend? As mens wedding rings become more and more popular mens moissanite wedding rings become popular at an even faster rate. Wedding rings for men are here to stay and so are mens moissanite wedding rings. What Goes Into Wedding Preparation From Your DJ? Exactly what should your disc jockey be doing in the weeks/months prior to your wedding? If you think that they just show up at your reception and are ready to go - you've missed out on what they've been doing to prepare.Typically, your DJ will meet you during the sales stage of things - you get to know him, they get to know what you are looking for. Replacing Your Lost Wedding Ring Imagine it's Halloween evening and you've just gone to the door to greet another eager child with your big bag of trick-or-treat candy. You look down at the grinning costumed child with a smile and share some kind words as you throw a generous handful of tasty treats into his bag. What Can We Learn From the "Runaway Bride" Story? Have you heard enough about the "Runaway Bride" yet? Well, stay tuned. This story is not going to wind down for a while. Selecting the Perfect Wedding Gift for the Bride and Groom One of the most memorable days in our lives is when two people commit their love to one another through marriage. Wedding gifts are traditionally offered to the newlyweds as tokens of affection and love as well as a means to provide the new couple with starter home supplies. Dressing Your Bridesmaids For a bride, shopping for bridesmaid dresses can be one of the most difficult aspects of wedding planning. How can the bride find a gown for her maids that will display her own taste, look great on every girl and will fit into the financial picture?There are so many colors and styles of dresses to choose from. Focus On What Is Important - Your Wedding Disc Jockey Choice Your true love got down on his knees and asked you to marry him. Barely able to get the words out, you say "I Will". Making a Budget For Your Wedding Just the thought of all the expenses that come with a wedding, can really put a damper on the most important day of your life, especially when you need to work within a financial frame of X dollars. To avoid the stress of facing too many decisions all at once, try making a budget for your wedding. The Second Time - Another White Wedding? That first wedding was a dream, a gorgeous long white wedding dress, a beautiful church, luscious bridesmaids and the groom in tails. Plus all the trimmings and a heavenly reception and a great honeymoon. Let Your Wedding Flowers Speak the Language of Love Congratulations! You have found the man of your dreams and are getting married. What a wonderful time in your life - full of promise, hope, and happiness. Living in LOVE : Remembering Why You Married The kids are yelling, the dog is barking, and you just found out that your spouse forgot to do the one thing that you needed them to do today?again! This scenario may sound typical for your family, or your scenario could be worse. Maybe you and your spouse are arguing more and more, and connecting less and less? You may have even asked yourself, "Is this marriage a mistake?". Planning your Weddings Decoration Budget When it comes to your decorating budget it really depends on where the ceremony and reception will be on what decorations need to be present as well as what if any; themes that you are choosing.For example, if you are planning an indoor dinner, you have to include centerpieces etc. The Perfect String Quartet Repertoire for Your Wedding Here follows suggestions and tips that will help you determine the ideal programme for your Wedding day. A String Quartet can provide music for every stage of your Wedding. Is Eloping For You? Believe it or not, there is etiquette on how to elope, and how to handle all the important people in your life who may feel spurned by your not including them. In addition, there are also some important questions you need to ask yourself before you run off and get hitched without including those most important to you. The High Cost of Resentment and Anger in Marriage Many spouses carry heavy suitcases filled with a collection of anger and resentment from their marriage. Periodically, they unpack these suitcases and review every situation in which they feel they were treated unfairly. Five Ideas for a More Romantic Honeymoon Candles, rose petals, satin, succulent foods, perfume-you're probably already familiar with all of these time-honored ingredients for creating a romantic mood on your honeymoon. But candles, rose petals, and other sensual ingredients only go so far. Celtic Diamond Rings - A Combination of History And Romance The symbolism of Celtic Diamond Rings is relevant to all cultures. Love and friendship intertwined in the Celtic symbols on the ring have relevance to every couple contemplating marriage. |
home | site map | contact us |